A 30 year old girl, woman and crone
No, this is not a post on the difference between good and evil, although I of course am obviously good and everything that opposes me is therefor clearly evil, this is a post about the difference between brilliant art and art that is anything else. I take art very liberally, I mean books, music, movies, food, paintings and pretty much anything conceived in a singular expression of creativity representing the maker’s intentions. Keep reading »
I’ve only known you for a very, very limited amount of time. To be honest, I never thought a relationship between us could ever work. Even more so after my little liaison with your (distant) relative.
Against my better judgement I decided to give it a try, and I’ve come to realize since then that this was a very big mistake. We were supposed to accomplish great things together, but after spending the better part of the afternoon with each other and you being a continuous source of pain and discomfort to me, I don’t think we’re going to make anything work in the long run. I’ve committed to this relationship, and I will see it through to the end my little porcupine.
However, once I’m done with our little project*, I don’t think I ever want to see you again.
I hope we can keep things civil until we don’t have to be confronted with each other anymore, and that you won’t mind if I keep seeing your (distant) relative* occasionally and when it suits me.
Regards,
M.
Let’s face it, knitting socks toe-up on DPN’s really can be a royal pain in the ass (if you sit on them), but mostly resembles trying to tickle a grumpy porcupine.
Links marked with * are links to Ravelry, which you will not be able to see without an account.
This:
Latest tweet
- RT @RickDeckardt: Naast giro 555 is er nu ook giro 666, voor het hek om dat land, jaartje wachten, goedkoop t landje verdelen, profit! http://twitter.com/Moi_Faragon
Might be a bit harsh for me. Normally I don’t condone such remarks, but lately I have noticed that we’ve all become (in my eyes) overly concerned with what happened in Haïti. I’ll admit that some people[dutch] have a personal reason to be concerned and moved by the disaster resulting from a major earthquake.
Maybe it’s just me, but I think the way we’re all concerned with letting other people know we’ve donated money and “helped” makes me sick. Are we really such a society that part of our social status comes from showing off our philanthropy? I can barely turn around on the Internet without being faced with cries for help. Not actual help, but requests for money to be donated to some bank account number that could belong to a seemingly sincere, but (possibly) illegitimate foundation. Even worse (in my eyes) are the marketing schemes, “some amount of every sale made in some period goes to a relief fund for Haïti”. It’s actually working, I’ve seen at least three people buy things they didn’t really need because *part* of the proceeds would go to a “good” cause. Just donate the entire amount to a legitimate national incentive and shut up about it!
Of course such catastrophes are horrible, they really, really are, but do we honestly have to force our own good deeds on everyone else? Can’t we just give what we can, be proud for ourselves and leave it at that? Do we (as a society) need peer pressure to be nice for a change?
It probably is me. Obviously the rest of the world must be sane about this ;-)
As I was standing in the shower a few days back, and I let my mind wander and wondered about the things we don’t say. Ever since then, my thoughts are drawn back to that, to why we don’t say what we don’t say.
I have come to expect openness and honesty from my friends, but judging myself honestly leads me to believe that I don’t extend the same courtesy to them. Does that make me a bad person or just easier to get along with?
Why am I afraid to be honest with my friends, if they are more likely to help than to judge? Why would I be reluctant to ask people about the things we agreed to do to begin with? I gave it a lot of thought and came to the conclusion that it’s fear. Fear of rejection mostly.
Is making the choice not to mention certain things something that will alienate people or will it do quite the opposite? Where is that boundary, between easy going and anti-social? On which end of the scale would I be?
I can’t figure it out. I’ve decided to make some changes in my attitude, and this has been one since December or so. Slowly but surely I’m taking more proactive steps to let people know how I feel and what I want. Hopefully I can weed out the people who aren’t willing to put up with me the way I am, and keep the ones that are there for the long haul.
Now if only I can pick up the phone tomorrow and make all the calls I want to make ;-) Oh well, those are worries for tomorrow :-)
As you might be aware, I have not blogged for over a year and a half, and only recently have I started to miss writing and expressing myself in any kind of creative way.
For some reason inspiration struck me somewhere half way through December and I started thinking about writing again.
So far I’ve started a blog-post, but my numerous thoughts on the matter just refuse to concatenate in such a way that would make sense to anyone but me, not to mention the 5 or so possible posts that I haven’t even begun to try to commit to paper or a computer.
Now I’m faced with a dilemma, should I blog regardless of my garbled mindset as I practice my writing, or should I practice all by myself without an audience to direct my thoughts at?
As I write this I realize the answer is probably to go with the former.
I don’t expect anyone to leave a reply, to be honest I don’t even expect anyone to still read this blog, but I might as well practice with you, my most faithful reader (who must exist in you as you read this) by the sideline because without you, writing anything would be pretty much useless anyway.
To blog or not to blog… It isn’t really a question.
I will blog.
The question is for whom, is it for your entertainment, for my benefit as a sounding board, or a combination of both?
I have cleaned up my apartment, that is to say, my bedroom is a semi mess, but that’s just because of the amount of unfolded laundry, should only take me one evening to sort that out as well (probably tomorrow night, as tonight is the last sunny evening in a while)
I have had two people for dinner over the weekend. Cooked my super-easy pasta salad on Saturday and by special request a brocoli pesto on Sunday, it was *brilliant*
I am still thinking about changing the setup of the living room, but I might need to wait till the rabbits are back outside, because they live in part of the living room now. (They will go back outside once the garden is redone, see the last point on this list)
I found the glass bricks I want to close my bedroom off with. Now I just have to see how expensive they are. By the looks of it, this is an easy way to put them in, no mortar needed, yay!
I want to try to finish putting in a zipper for my friend Wednesday night and finish my dress (the one with the cherries) on Thursday night. As my apartment will be shiny by then, I’m “allowed”. :-)
My new kitchen will have to wait a little while, as I’m still a bit short on the funding side of things. I still need about 25%, which is either my tax-money back (which will also buy me a car) or about two more months saving.
I slept like a baby all last week and over the weekend, hopefully an early night again tonight :-) (I love sleeping and I love my bed)
I have been running on a semi regular basis with my dog again, around a lake/wood area near my place. We both *love* it. Nothing compared to Friday Night Skate yet, but we’re getting there, running 2 km’s every other night now.
Tonight some guy will come over to make me a proposal for putting in two terraces and some paths in my garden. The coming week I will be seeing some more of these guys, so hopefully I can get a good deal. (I would love to do it myself, but my back just isn’t up for it :-( )
I have just decided that I’ll throw my life around.
I’ll clean up my apartment, starting tonight.
I’m going to entertain people at my place more often again, I loved doing that, and I just never get around to it anymore.
I might change the setup of the living room.
I might close off the space between the living room and the bed room, perhaps with the see through glass bricks that you can’t really see through.
All my sewing projects will have to be on hold until the apartment is shiny again.
I’ll order my new kitchen ASAP. (New and improved, with a higher work surface and a dishwasher, both for less back-ache)
I’ll get some extra sleep over the weekend, as I’m completely exhausted right now, and I’ll start running in the mornings again.
I’ll try to get my physical condition back to where I can participate in the Friday Night Skate, and I’ll put in more of an effort to go do *FUN* [TM] stuff with my dog. Right now I just walk her, but I don’t really go anywhere that often since they closed the park near my house and I can’t walk towards the big park anymore.
I’ll fix up my garden this summer, as I want a terrace and to be able to BBQ out there.
Do you know where your towel is? (Which Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy character are you?)
Ford Prefect (Ix)
Kyah, almost the funnest guy in the known universe besides your pal Zaphod. You know how to have a good time, even if all the sods around you dont. Why dont you ditch Arthur already and go to a party? You’re pretty impressive (After all, you work for the GUIDE) and you have been scarred for life because of your long term residence on earth. Of course, you left eventually, and you always knew where your towel was.
CEST 2008 May 13 01:36:19
-!- Faragon [~faragon@83.68.0.49] has quit [Ping timeout]
May 14 10:10:34 coffee spamd[722]:
spamd: connection from localhost [127.0.0.1] at port 3622
A total downtime of approximately 1 day, 8 hours and 34 minutes. (If you take into account that I “normally” receive spam every second, and 15 seconds, but who’s counting? Mind you, then I should also calculate how long the timeout for the ping was, so let’s just keep it at 32,5 hours of downtime)
From what I heard, the problem was so obscure, engineers had to be flown into the country to fix it. Mind you, kudos to the brave men (and possibly, hopefully also women) who sacrificed their sleep, and quite possibly sanity to fix this malfunction.
If I ever find out who fixed it, I’ll make sure they get some sort of recognition here :-)
* Faragon shivers
It’s very freakin’ early and it’s very freakin’ cold!
I *love* my job, somehow a minor ajustment on my part resulted in the feeling that I have a completely new and even greater job. However, if I have to get up at 4:30 (ish) to get to work in time (5:45), I do start doubting my choices.
After about 10 minutes of contemplating, I still decided I have a great job though ;-) So off to work in a bit!
Gives me the added advantage that I will be able to go to the City Hall and request a driving license this afternoon, as I passed my (first) exam on Monday. (Yay!)